Archive for light

Bruins Just Lost I’m Shitfaced!

Posted in fiction, Life, spiritualism, Uncategorized, Weird with tags , , , , , , on May 3, 2009 by benwaysrustyscalpel

If you are wondering what a writer can produce while shitfaced and masturbating at the speed of light. It is not a ten foot arch of semen, No, it is enlightenment. As skin and skin rubs together, and dust is created in a maelstrom of friction, a magnetic dust field is created. Whilst eyes tear with effort, and with ball dust, one must concentrate on the fast twitch muscles in the wrist. It is impossible to ejaculate at this speed and so the artisan must maintain the anal tensing and muscle contraction in continual light speed orgasm. When an hour is spent and the muscles are ready to shred to pieces, when the euphoria of mind is too long lasting to maintain its injection of serotonin, the mastorbatopolous that is this Jesus Christ of pole shacking, explodes into a netherworld of unconsciousness. This is the only known enlightenment for a western mind. Zen Mastrabotoriasm.